Trigger warning: sexual and physical abuse, rape, childhood abuse
I wasn't always healthy, thriving, and living the life of my dreams as I am today. It was a long, winding, and difficult path from the rock-bottom lifestyle I once participated into where I am now.
Like so many others, I grew up in a highly dysfunctional home, which was the cause of a large chunk of my childhood trauma, but two main events had the most significant impact. One was when I was molested at ten by a friend's brother during a sleepover, and the second was when I was sent to live with my aunt and her husband at fifteen. During this time, I was brainwashed and groomed into being a second wife by my fifty-seven-year-old uncle. I was in that situation for about a year and a half before my parents found out, and I was removed.
As I grew into a young adult, I avoided dealing with my childhood trauma and began down the destructive path of rock-bottom living. I spent the next twenty-plus years drug and alcohol addicted, homeless on and off, and consistently in abusive relationships that compounded my suffering and added to my wounding.
I made efforts over the years to improve my life and circumstances. Still, I struggled to gain positive momentum because I mainly focused on the manifestation of my unresolved wounding, which was my substance abuse. I often say I feel like I spend many years doing a two-step forward, one-step-backward dance through life.
It wasn't until 2016 when things dramatically began to shift for me when, one afternoon, I had finally had enough. I was living with someone who, like me, had a severe dependency on alcohol, and because of this, the relationship was dysfunctional and toxic. There was a lot of verbal and physical abuse.
On this particular day in 2016, I was journaling affirmations to feel better and do something positive when the words "I deserve to be happy" flew across the page. I knew these words had been channeled from something outside of myself, and when I read them, they triggered something inside of me that brought me to my knees. I began to sob, and a sound so primal and raw was released from deep inside me.
So many years of pain, shame, self-loathing, and trauma compounded by more trauma were released through those screams and tears shed. I knew at that moment that I was willing to do anything that needed to be done to heal my life, and my journey began. I was done running from my past and allowing it to destroy my future.
One step at a time, I began telling new stories and co-creating a life I was proud to live. I started showing up to do the work consistently and relentlessly, and my passion and purpose were birthed through my healing.
As I started to improve my life, amazing things started happening to me, and I understood that if I could turn my life around, anyone could. I wanted to share my story of healing and the tools and techniques I used with everyone suffering. I knew firsthand that recovery was possible for anyone willing to do the work, and I wanted to help as many people as possible.
Over the years, I have obtained many certifications, but I have learned the most through my own experience with healing.
It's been seven and a half years since those words flew across my journal page, but the life I live today is a life I could never have imagined at that time. I have moved from just surviving to thriving in every way. My life is full of joy and abundance. My relationships continue to heal as I continue to heal, and I have had the honor of helping thousands of other people worldwide feel good and find their way to joyful living.
I do this through my books, blogs, podcasts, classes, events, and 1:1 coaching programs.
I have shared a very watered-down version of my story here for the sake of space, but you can learn more about my history with trauma and how I healed my life in my first book, Alchemy of The Phoenix: From the Ashes of Trauma to The Light of Love.
Please know you are worthy of anything and everything you desire, and with the right tools and mindset, you can have it all!
I love you so much,
Kelly
